Why you should never marry

For many years now I've been having these same dreams. Dreams where I'm married, have kids, a house, nice cars and enough money to never have to worry. Just last night a dream recurred. But this time it was a little different than the others. This time it had a message that sent a chill up my spine.

I guess you can say I keep having dreams about the good old American Dream if you will. In this particular dream I was with this woman presumably my wife and our child. We were sitting on a ledge talking. My wife being so caring was warning me not to look over the edge of the ledge because I guess she didn't want me to fall. Of course dream can get strange, and most people don't really think dreams mean anything. But in the dream I looked over the edge anyhow. When I looked over I saw a wooden floor with holes in it, as if someone was reconstructing the floor to make it safe. I said to my wife, "It looks like they're doing some reconstruction down there. It's not that far down maybe I should jump down to make sure it's safe if we ever decide to walk on that particular floor.

My wife said no. She told me to look to my right and I did. There I saw a big opening to who knows where. "Wow!" I said, "That looks dangerous, take Manna back in side and don't let her get close to the edge. She did and then she came back. I lovingly looked into her eyes and tried to take her hand to tell her how I felt about her. Then suddenly she abruptly took a step back, then turned her head and walked away from me.

I know this dream sounds strange, as if you've never had strange dreams yourself. But I woke up with this eerie feeling. I know that it was only a dream, but I thought "Now why would my wife act like she loves me so, only to play with my emotions and totally blow me off like that?" Now mind you, I've never been married but I have been deeply in love before. So I started to reevaluate what my desires truly are.

I still desire to marry and produce children, but now I wonder is it worth it? I started to think about all the people I know who were, or got married. First, I thought about my own mother and father -they got divorced. I even had a friend who got married and now he never has time to pursue his childhood dreams. I also thought about two neighbors I knew who were once married, but their spouses committed adultery on them, and ever since that happened they've never been the same. Now always trying to find a way to create a kind of relationship with their children that a broken household can not create.

So all these thoughts crashed my brain and I started to wonder, "Marriage, is it really worth it? Is it really worth the pain should something go direly wrong?" Then, I started to think of reasons why I shouldn't get married. And I made a list:

1) If I get married and create a fortune my wife could commit adultery, divorce me for half my fortune and spend it with some other man.

2) If I have a divorce, how would that impact my children? It could destroy them, and their lives. Their minds being so fragile at such a young age, they could end up in such a great depression or worse.

3) What about child support and alimony? My ex-wife could make me out to be the worst husband to the courts (a deadbeat) just out of spite, and create some sort of custody battle that could drag on for years.

4) What if my wife only married me for the money?

5) How do I know my wife won't cheat on me? She could get away with it for years with a younger man, and I would never find out.

6) Marriage in most religions states that if two people marry, then it should be 'Till death do they part'. I know now this is mainly for the children, to keep their minds safe and not to toy with their fragile emotions. If ones were to divorce because of infidelity, they should never remarry. Neither the man nor the woman -for the sake of the kids until they're grown. They should still act as if man and wife so that the children can grow up having both parents, and become more mentally and emotionally stable. So am I ready to step up to THE plate and handle this kind of challenge? I'm I really ready, I'm I really prepared?

7) Phew, that's really a lot and I wonder if people who marry are just jumping into it without thinking all this over? I wonder is that why we have so many cases of these broken homes, bad marriages, cases of infidelity and even murder out of jealously or money?

I know all this may sound like I'm looking at marriage negatively. That being possible, I'm also looking at it realistically as well. The truth always hurts, but it also fashions us to want to do better. So no since in always running away from it. What good will that do? Just prolonging the inevitable.

So this is my new blog titled "Why you should never marry". I'm not telling anyone not to, just listing reasons why not to. With all that said, I can only find one thing wrong it. That being I still want to experience fatherhood.



KRahmaan
Have you forgotten your childhood dreams?